Difference between BDSM and Abuse

I had my slave tell me that her father is concerned with our relationship.  You see, she is a 24/7 slave and wears a collar nonstop...but her dad is concerned that she is the victim of abuse.  He even sent her links to show that the 50 Shades of Grey type relationships are all centered around abuse. Apparently there is a lot of uninformed douchesque-folk-with-psychology-degrees thinking they know something (look, I get that taking a psych course is a fun way to diagnose yourself and your friends but please stay away from BDSM if you have never been in a BDSM relationship.

So I feel I must break it down for people seeking the truth and yet brave enough to get past the 'adult content' warning site that blogger.com forces down my throat (and it doesn't even seem the slightest bit appealing too. It looks more like a 'turn back from this virus infested webpage -- proceed at your own risk.')

Ok, so here goes...BDSM VS. Abuse:

BDSM uses pain and bodily sensations to elicit pleasure.
ABUSE uses pain and bodily sensations to cause physical, mental and emotional harm.

BDSM involves consenting people with safe words so anyone can stop at any time.
ABUSE involves a person that feels trapped in a situation who desperately wants to escape but can't.

BDSM sends people to the hospital with vibrators 'lost' in an anus.
ABUSE sends people to the hospital with broken bones.

BDSM has the submissive willingly and consciously give away their power.
ABUSE takes a person's power away by force.

BDSM makes people feel alive, free and happy

ABUSE make people feel depressed, irritable, moody, guilty, shameful or in denial and numb.

BDSM has people schedule sessions and plan scenes when they are free
ABUSE can happen whenever and it is only one side that wants it to happen, ever.

BDSM frown on excessive alchol use during a scene as it is unsafe (but many smoke weed).
ABUSE has people getting blind drunk and angry.

BDSM causes your partner to feel excited and frequently has (at least one) orgasm.
ABUSE causes your partner to feel afraid of you.

BDSM has people wearing sexy clothes to turn their partner on.
ABUSE has people wearing stained and sweaty wifebeaters.

BDSM is based on trust.
ABUSE destroys all trust.

BDSM is very much concerned with the safety of all participants
ABUSE is about cruelty and making your partner feel unsafe 

BDSM has a Dom yelling at a sub for cumming without permission.
ABUSE has a dickhead yelling at a someone because she parked the car too close to the curb.

BDSM is about making your partner feel elated and loved
ABUSE is about making one person feel 'bigger' and much more important than the other.

BDSM has a practice called 'aftercare' where you check in and care for your slave in the hours and days after the session, offering them emotional and physical support.
ABUSE has a practice called 'stalking' where the abuser follows and tries to control every aspect of the person's life so that they never feel safe.

BDSM has people beg to be 'abused'
ABUSE has people beg not to be abused

BDSM has a debrief afterwards so they can improve next time
ABUSE has apologies and excuses afterwards

BDSM promises it will happen again and again
ABUSE promises it will never happen again

BDSM is fun
ABUSE is terrifying.